Summer of '98

A few months ago, Josh discovered the way to my heart is by taking me to see famous guys I have a crush on. It started with Anderson Cooper back in May (he had never seen me that excited! I'm getting flushed talking about...) and continued this week.

Let's go back in time:

It's the summer of 97, and 'Mmmbop' is creating a stir. Three long haired, squeaky teen brothers singing something no one else could pronounce. I didn't like them cause they had long hair, and that's just silly. But by the summer of '98 this was my bedroom:



I wasted A LOT of time defending their long hair; and hanging up posters. I had a lone friend that liked them, Carrieann.

I was convinced I was going to marry Taylor Hanson. I believe an excerpt from my 7th grade journal reads:

'I am in love with Taylor Hanson. I know we're meant to be together. I just know it.'

The best day of my 13 year old life was seeing them in Detroit. I spent every moment babysitting that summer, and had $200 to spend on merch. (Who does that?!) Came home with a life size poster. Taylor looked right at me that night and smiled. Didn't he? Yes, I'm sure of it.

I can still draw the Hanson logo if needed.

Back to present day:
The moment they walked on stage I may have had to take my sweater off. They look exactly the same, except taller, with short hair. Still squeaky. I'm sure Taylor remembers me. I could be that fan that says, 'Remember when I waved to you from stage 12 years ago and we had a 'moment'? That was special, huh?'

The rest of the night was a blur of fried pickles, and watching a touchy-feely boyfriend whisper sweet Hanson nothings into his girlfriend's ear.

Josh couldn't whisper sweet nothings in my ear because he had his ear plugs in. We prefer to text when we can't talk in normal voices.

Oh, and I think I saw Nick Jonas slow dancing with a drunk girl. Can't be sure.

Conversation on the way home:

Me: Wow, that was great. Brings back so many memories from when I saw them back in 1998.

Josh: What?! You've seen them before?? I thought I was fulfilling a dream!!

Oops. ;)

Torture Diet

Josh and I started doing the South Beach Diet last week. I've done this several times in the past, and typically eat a low carb diet due to my blood sugar anyway, so this was not a big change for me. Josh, however, can't believe that someone who loves him would torture him in such a way. (For the record, this diet was actually his idea.)

Day 1 (Pumped Up Day)
Not that bad. We had steak for dinner. This was also the day Josh discovered sugar free pudding. A true gem. It's not rare for me to see him dejectedly looking in the fridge, sigh, and then pull out 3 pudding cups.

Day 2 (Crushing Hope Day)
This was a sad day. We went to Kroger to load up on veggies and Josh ran off to look at pastries while I shopped. I thought he was just torturing himself, but he came walking down my aisle with a huge smile on his face, carrying a sugar free apple pie.

He thought he beat the system.

It crushed me to break it to him that we could not have it because of the carbs. He commented that he would not survive if he were stranded on a desert island. We bought 5 packs of sugar free pudding. That's 30 pudding cups, for those of you counting at home.

Day 3 (Breaking the Spirit Day)
I started hearing the word(s?) 'al dente' a lot. Apparently Josh likes all of his vegetables this way. I'm not positive he knows what it means (heck, I don't even know what it means), but I Googled some recipes. This was also the day of the 'begging for Cheerios' incident. I don't want to talk about it.

Day 4 (Rock Bottom Day)
This day involved a lot of sleep. Josh said the only time he wasn't frustrated or hungry was when he was sleeping. I believe I heard the phrase 'life's not worth living' at one point.

Josh admitted he was convinced I made this diet up and started Googling. Much to his chagrin, the diet was real and the website was NOT a good source for coming up with fun new foods to eat. He was looking for some sort of 'hidden gem' in this diet madness. He commented that you can eat anything you want, except for what you want.

I commented that he gets mad at me a lot. He told me he just gets mad and I happen to be around a lot. Luckily, I do not take it personally.

Day 5 (Desperation Day)
We were pulling into the driveway after dinner with the family, (which consisted of us bringing our own broccoli while everyone else ate mashed potatoes and glorious carbs), when I mentioned that he could eat pepperoni. He slammed on the brakes, threw the car in reverse, and off to the store we went. He ate a pack on the way home. Apparently he liked that idea.

Other things I have seen/heard this week:
-Josh order a Diet Coke.
-Josh eating salsa and peanut butter with a spoon.
-'The only emotion I feel is hunger.'
-'Write that down for your blog.'
-'I can't quit cause my failure will be on your blog.'
-'I want to burn the South Beach website.'

We're now on Day 8 and have turned a corner.

We even have weight loss charts on the wall in our bedroom.

Current weight loss:

Josh= 6 lbs
Ashley= 0 lbs

Oiy.

Dear Husband

Dear Husband,

There are a few things I probably should have told you before we got married.

-I'm going to keep all the wedding magazines I collected during our engagement. And I'll still pull them out from time to time.

-I have a cupboard full of mixing bowls, and I need to keep every single one of them.

-I also need to keep the kitchen gadgets that I can't remember the names of, and can't remember what their uses are.

-I have great ideas about what the kitchen should look like. Oh, I forgot. You actually already learned that when we registered for wedding gifts.

-When we're shopping and my purse is in the cart, you are not allowed to leave it unattended for any reason.

-When we travel, I'm going to take my hair dryer, curling iron, straightener, mousse, hairspray, AND 2 shampoos.

-Then I'll take 20 minutes to do my hair, and end up putting it in a ponytail.

-I'm also going to take a bag full of drinks and snacks. And we'll have to stop every hour to use the bathroom.

-Then weI'll probably need to stop for snacks when the ones I brought don't look interesting.

-OH! And the night before we leave for our honeymoon, I'm going to realize we need an oil change AND my drivers license is expired.

-If a bug flies down my shirt, I'm going to scream and jump around. I might even drop the bag of groceries I'm carrying and break everything inside.

-I might wash our towels with a rug and die them all brown. And I there's a good chance I'll keep burning everything I cook.

-My car will often be a mess. I might have to clear a spot for you when you ride with me.

-I'm going to drive you absolutely crazy, but I'm too cute for you to get mad at.

Here's to another list in 3 more months!

Love,

Your Wife