Thursday, July 22, 2010

Off We Go

Last weekend I made the trek up to Michigan for the third time this summer. This time was in a van filled with my 15 year old sister, my 10 year old brother, and my mom.

4:03 am
My day started when I awoke to my normally quiet neighbors singing. Loudly and drunkenly. Along to a CD of Spanish music. Is that the correct genre name? Now the singing did irritate me, but what irritated me more was the fact that their dog, Lucky, who barks at me through the fence anytime I take out the trash or start the grill, seemed to actually like the singing and sat quietly watching.

4:03-4:59 am
I sit awake listening to the singing with a piercing headache. And watching Josh sleep soundly.

5:00 am
Josh and Brittney wake up well rested and ready to go. I curse at both of them quietly. Josh thinks the neighbors tried out for American Idol this week and were celebrating. Brittney thinks it's really weird that someone would get up in the middle of the night to sit outside and sing.

5:45 am
We leave the house just as the amigos next door go to sleep for the night.

7:00 am
After dropping Josh at the airport, driving to Lebanon, and a stop at McDonald's, we're finally officially on our way. Mom's driving, I'm eating.

7:08 am
The minute I'm done eating, mom yanks the car to the side of the road so we can switch drivers. I did not see this coming.

7:32 am
Have to stop for a cow in the road. Then a squirrel. Then I ran into a butterfly.

8:45 am
2nd McDonald's stop for a bathroom break. Brittney gets a large drink. Mom gets a large coffee. I glare at them.

9:17 am
3rd McDonald's. When we're back in the car, I ask that we make it our personal goal to not stop until at least 10:30.

10:43 am
Goal met! And slightly succeeded, but let's not get too excited. Bathroom break and gas fill up.

12:02 pm
Lunch stop. We hit McDonald's for the 4th time, AND Burger King. Highlights: I have to show Brittney how to get in the restaurant. Guy at McDonald's gives my change to someone else.

12:23 pm
I get flipped off after honking at a lady that pulled out in front of me. Brittney is outraged. I laugh.

1:34 pm
Brittney tries to tell me how I can improve myself. Just as we're passing a prison and see this sign:

I stop the car and try to drop her off, but mom forces me to keep driving.
We stop at Dairy Queen and she buys me ice cream. All is forgiven.

And other than mom denying me a 5th stop at McDonald's, and David asking if he can drive, and then chanting 'kick Ashy's butt, kick Ashy's butt' after I tell him no, the rest of the drive was uneventful and we arrived around 5 pm.

The rest of the weekend was filled with lots of fun with family: Birthday party for my cousin, family reunion, and family girls' night at the Three Rivers hot spot...Apple Bee's!

I'm flying next time.

Tuesday, July 13, 2010


We have a spare guest room. It's where I put all my clothes and accessories because they won't all fit in our bedroom. And so I don't have to wake Josh up when I blow dry my hair every morning. It's kinda nice. My own space where I can be a little messy and not annoy my clean husband.

Until recently. Recently, I realized I'm actually sharing the space with someone else. A little guy that looks something like this:

My first encounter was when Josh was out of town, as all encounters with bugs and critters and things that break are. Nothing happens when he's here. I'm 99% sure they can smell fear.

I noticed there were crumbs and...other evidence of a critter in the guest room. I had a bag of peanuts in a travel bag from a recent trip, and he chewed through a cloth AND plastic bag to get to his feast. Gotta give the guy points for effort.

I never actually saw or heard him. So I went about my business in the back room and hoped he had slipped out, never to return.

Two days later, I was sure we were in the clear. Then I walked in the room, flipped on the light, and saw him scurry across the room.

I screamed.



Luckily, Josh was home and I was able to ruin his hearing.

He told me to calm down.

I said no and vowed to never go in the back room again.

I asked Josh where the mouse went.

My closet of course.

A few days later, I was running out of clothes from the small stash in our bedroom. I was re-wearing clothes for the third time. I was starting to smell. So I snuck back there, on tip toe. And I heard him rustling around. I ran.

I decided to only go in the guest room if Josh went first. He had to do all the laundry. Josh even tried a cat call on him, but it didn't work.

We set traps. Apparently there were 3 of them.

It's now been a month, and despite 5 traps and D-con, we haven't seen another.

Last week I opened the front door and walked my face right into a spider. Landed on my cheek.

On a happier note, the ants in the kitchen seem to be gone.

Friday, July 2, 2010


I like garage sales. A lot. I love thrift stores, and I get really pumped when I find stuff at a bargain.

I also love Plato's Closet. A consignment store, featuring only the latest in fashion. After a notsosuccessful yard sale, I decided to take my 3 garbage bags of clothes, shoes and accessories to Plato's to see what I could get for them. I had 3 bags. That's a lot! Success was pretty much guaranteed. Josh even had to help me carry them in.

I hefted the bags up on the counter, and watched the lady's eyes get huge. Never before had they seen so much brought in by one person! And then I waited.

Naturally, I started shopping. I figured I could buy at least 3 shirts, and still have money to spare, after they bought all my cool clothes. I'm thinking I'd walk out of there with $ $50.

They say it takes about 20 minutes to go through your clothes. After 35 minutes, Josh was waiting outside, and I was tapping my foot whilst sighing loudly. That was when I realized they write your name on the board when they're done, and you go up to the counter to receive your results.


So I go up, and they bring my bin over of stuff they want to buy. I see my garbage bags sitting on the back shelf and think 'Jackpot! They want to keep it all!'

2 shirts. That's it. That's all they wanted of my wardrobe. The lady sheepishly told me that's all that was trendy enough for them. Her sympathy made my face turn red.

I put my 3 shirts back and walked out with $4. I had to call Josh to come back in and carry my 3 bags out, while the other customers cleared the way and stared. I think one of them shook her head in pity.

I think they still talk about me sometimes. There might even be a story posted in the store about me titled 'What NOT to do.' Hopefully they didn't get me on camera. I can't be sure because I haven't been back. But I've heard rumors.

Next time I'll be ready, Plato's. You just wait.